Cite Your Mother

[Nellie]

One of the questions I've been asked is if I would write my mother up if I pulled her over. Have any of you pulled over a relative or a friend and actually given them a citation? If so, how did it affect your relationship with that person?

[Mac]

One of the questions I've been asked is if I would write my mother up if I pulled her over...

I still think that's one of the silliest questions to ask an applicant.....might as well ask "If you become an officer and find yourself speeding while off-duty, will you write yourself a ticket when you got back to work?".

Have any of you pulled over a relative or a friend and actually given them a citation?
No, and no.

[retchp]

I once stopped my mom for speeding. She refused to give me her DL so I put a twist lock on her and yanked her out onto the pavement and proned her butt out. I then knee dropped her and slaped the cuffs on. Just as I was standing her up and fixing to jam her into the cage, up drives my brother. He became enraged and charged me so I put the stick to him big time. After he went down I cuffed him up and threw him in the cage with Ma and hauled their butts to the slammer.
When I got home that night and told the wife, she went off on me and I had to slap her around a little. the cops were called, but since I was on the job the matter was dropped.
Now Mom, Dad and my brother won't speak to me and my wife long ago left...good riddance. Guess that'll show everybody! God its lonely here on this park bench....

[Your Mentor]

:biggrin: Hilarious stuff!!!

I know a guy, who promoted to sgt. a few years ago, who had dinner with his neighbors one night and then wrote his neighor's wife a ticket the next day. This guy is infamous on the Department for stories like that. My graveyard partner had to pair up with him for a month of graves and said it was the longest month of his career. I also know he has had more BIA audits because of citizen's complaints. EVERYONE in our squad hated him and we were petrified he was going to promote in place. Lucky for us he didn't but those who've worked for him hate him even more as a sergeant. Do you think he's happy when he's off-duty? Not even guys and gals from the job will sit on his park bench.

As retchp illustrated so well; the authority you will be given can either be weilded or, instead, you can steward that authority. Temper what you do with common sense and the consider the circumstances every time. Or go live on a park bench.

[Tom]

I wrote myself a ticket today because I was going 26 in a school zone. Damn!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

[ResQ]

Tom, nice lead in... One of my first real supervisors taught me some lessons about basic law enforcement and I think this topic had its roots in the same ideas....Letter of the Law versus Spirit of the Law...and it sounds like from Mentor's experience, that guy noone liked had a problem differentiating. I gues another good question would be...For those with little to no law enforcement expereince...how and/or when is this difference taught? What are some unique situations that you guys have been in where you were challenged with this decision, or what situations come up most frequently? Being military LE 9 times out of 10 you would hook someone up and then see them at the BX infront of you in line the next day...it was hard to not feel hated!

and if you must you can tease about the military LE stuff...but that is why I did it because it was more controlled, and I wouldn't trade it for anything!! Now that I am more mature...Big Leagues...here I come

[Tom]

From my experience, it's just common sense. I've known people that are super smart and are horrible cops because they have zero common sense. After a while on the job you just "get a feeling." Does this guy need a ticket or a verbal warning, should I be extra careful on this stop because of Officer safety or not.......It's hard to describe but after a while you just know the "right" thing to do.

I've verbally warned TONS of people for excessive speed why wouldn't I do the same to my brother/mother/friend? As said before it's a silly question. Yes spirit of the law and letter of the law......I lean a lot towards spirit.......now if I get an attitude or lip...well......then you may have failed the attitude test.

I spent 9+ years in the military, thankfully, not a lot of experience with the Shore patrol but there probably isn't as much a difference as you may think. I have seen people that I have written tickets in stores before. They usually don't recognize me...thank goodness.

Tom

[SB 405]

One of the questions I've been asked is if I would write my mother up if I pulled her over. Have any of you pulled over a relative or a friend and actually given them a citation? If so, how did it affect your relationship with that person?When I first read this Nellie I thought you were just yankin' everyone's chain. I had no idea this was an actual question until I started reading everyone's response. Then I started thinking about Mentor's comment on another post about things seeming out of line or the "what does this have to do with anything" factor. Mentor also said something about just going with the flow and it will make sence in the end. I guess somewhere along the line your answer tells them something about your character? My answer to such a question would be honest,upfront short and to the point. "No, I would not cite a friend nor a member of my family" Something that's worked against me at times in life is being honest but I feel better knowing I responded with how I really feel about an issue.

[Mac]

From my experience, it's just common sense. I've known people that are super smart and are horrible cops because they have zero common sense.
Amen. Common sense is at least as important as "book smarts", and unfortunately there are those in law enforcement (as everywhere else in the world) who absolutely don't have it. Call it whatever you want - "letter of the law vs. spirit of the law", "gray areas" or whatever, but to some people these concepts just don't exist. IMO, those people make lousy officers, and they go on to make lousy supervisors and managers (if they make it that far). Both law and policy are subject to some interpretation, and judicious application of the "human factor". Part of what we're paid to do is exercise good judgment and common sense out there, and anybody who doesn't do it is falling short.

After a while on the job you just "get a feeling." Does this guy need a ticket or a verbal warning, should I be extra careful on this stop because of Officer safety or not.......It's hard to describe but after a while you just know the "right" thing to do.
Exactly. A good cop is part psychologist and part diplomat also. Knowing how to read people will go a LONG way toward making your career a lot easier. You don't ruin as many uniforms in fights, don't get as many complaints, and don't spend as much time in the sergeants' office. Or as I've been known to succintly sum it up: "There are people you can say 'f***' to, and there are people you can't say 'f***' to." :smile: It's very important to be able to discern the difference between the two.

[dw]

"There are people you can say 'f***' to, and there are people you can't say 'f***' to." Smile It's very important to be able to discern the difference between the two.

You got that right, Mac. We have to adapt to different people in each enforcement contact. Every contact is unique, some warrant a verbal warning, some a citation. You don't speak to the 16-year old who's burning it up in his dads car the same way as an elderly person, or the dirt-bag that just got out of Folsom. Occasionally, as Mac said, "using vernacular familiar to the subject to emphasize the severity of your point" is most effective. (Quote from an ISU investigator who spoke at a training day.) Communication is one of the biggest assets an officer can possess. You really can shift night to day from one stop to the next. A lot of it is commanding and imparting respect, and that differs among people, genders, cultures, etc...

My mother, by the way, is very disappointed in me for citing my Uncle Harold. But in my defense, he was going the wrong way on the freeway while reading a book, shaving, talking on a cell phone, and changing his child's diaper. ;)

[kenny]

I wouldnt cite them if they were being really dangourus ide have another officer cite them you know what I mean?

[exprezchef]

While assigned to a resident post I feel that you need to be even more diplomatic when dealing with violators than someone who works only the freeway beats. Since you live in the same community that you enforce it is very common to run into the same violators. While off duty you run into people that you have cited or arrested. It is always in the back of my mind when I am out with my family. I feel that I have always treated my "customers" with professionalism and respect and it has never been a problem. I once had to arrest a party out of a DUI TC that was a friend of my sons mother. Even though I had only met her once or twice before, it was an awkward situation. A few weeks ago I got into a 2800 CVC pursuit with a motorcycle rider and after he was caught and his helmet was removed, I realized it was a friends son. My friend was understanding and had no hard feelings toward me. I am constantly thinking about the "spirit of the law, letter of the law" when I stop someone I know or have stopped before.

[WannaBeaChippie]

I once stopped my mom for speeding. She refused to give me her DL so I put a twist lock on her and yanked her out onto the pavement and proned her butt out. I then knee dropped her and slaped the cuffs on. Just as I was standing her up and fixing to jam her into the cage, up drives my brother. He became enraged and charged me so I put the stick to him big time. After he went down I cuffed him up and threw him in the cage with Ma and hauled their butts to the slammer.
When I got home that night and told the wife, she went off on me and I had to slap her around a little. the cops were called, but since I was on the job the matter was dropped.
Now Mom, Dad and my brother won't speak to me and my wife long ago left...good riddance. Guess that'll show everybody! God its lonely here on this park bench....Good Point....

[Tiredmotor]

" friend of my sons mother"

Mmmm..must be a mis-typo thing here..or an ex.....or something like that........

[exprezchef]

" friend of my sons mother"

Mmmm..must be a mis-typo thing here..or an ex.....or something like that........

It was a typo...to clarify, it was the mother my sons friend. :smile:

[FDandH]

My grandmother once asked my father(LEO) if he would ever write her a ticket, dad's response was he would call for back-up.:biggrin:

[Flying Pig]

I worked with a guy who was notorious for writing the nurses and doctors at our local hospital cites....as well as relatives of officers in the OUR department. Are they exempt...no.......but it can make for a hostile work environment to say the least. Then people wonder why we sit in the ER with a patient for 8 hours for a simple OK to book check. Oh well.

I like Toms response....we warn people about traffic violations everyday.....Common sense is a HUGE part of this job. And Common Sense tells me you dont cite the local ER nurses, or the wives of your beat partners.......

[5-0]

i wrote my daughters classmate a ticket for exhibition, in front of the school after hours. she signed the ticket and i kept all copies, i mailed the yellow to her parents!!!!they were petrified and wanted to talk to me. they framed it and is in her room, a reminder, they call it. good people. kids just act different when adults arent around and egged on by their peirce.... and no ididnt turn the 215 in........funny she is now premed at princeton>>>> i guess i taught her a lesson!

[makakona]

just after he got his license, my husband got busted for rolling a stop sign near the local library. he said he wasn't too concerned about the ticket... until the officer told him he'd better make it home and tell his dad before the officer could get dad on the phone. not even in the same office and my husband was busted!

funny... my brother-in-law was written by one of my husband's seniors, who knew my husband well, for tint. brother dropped every family name he could think of and was written for it anyway. he called my husband to see if he'd write it off for him. "sure, once you remove the tint!" it was my husband's third day at the office and brother actually thought my husband would write off the ticket (not that time on job matters when it comes to character, but still!). husband sent him to our cousin, who is 14 years chp. brother wasn't happy when cousin had the same response.

[Chippysgt]

I tried to pay my partner to write my ex-wife a ticket but he insisted on doing it for nothing..................:cool:

[chico.medic]

A friend of mine's wife got cited, and he always saw the citing officers wife speeding late at night, he assumed on her way home from work. He made a stop and ended up getting a deuce out of it. That's one way to one up your old, grouchy beat partner.

[USAF_SFS]

Being military LE 9 times out of 10 you would hook someone up and then see them at the BX infront of you in line the next day...it was hard to not feel hated!

and if you must you can tease about the military LE stuff...but that is why I did it because it was more controlled, and I wouldn't trade it for anything!! Now that I am more mature...Big Leagues...here I come

So true...Everyone I've ever cited or apprehended I've seen within a week

[Your Mentor]

Running into prior enforcement contacts is common on this job as well. Particularly in rural areas. I was checking out the CA DOJ sex offender site to see who was lurking around my beat. Later that day, while going through the check out line at the local market, I noticed one of these characters standing in line behind me.

[Sportbiker]

...or the dirt-bag that just got out of Folsom.

ok for those who are new to this thread...lets make it clear that good ol' dw meant Folsom Prison, right?? haha cause im from Folsom, and it sounded like you were talking about if your left the city of folsom, youre a dirt-bag.....haha.

Id pull my mom over just for the fun of it, cause shes one of those "hot blondes in a mercedes coupe," at least i have been told that; give her a lil scare before i asked for her license. But as for a ticket or knee checkin her to get cuffs on....i dont think so.

[David]

...or the dirt-bag that just got out of Folsom.

ok for those who are new to this thread...lets make it clear that good ol' dw meant Folsom Prison, right?? haha cause im from Folsom, and it sounded like you were talking about if your left the city of folsom, youre a dirt-bag.....haha. I hear ya. :lol: I've got family there. Just not in the Prison. Come to think of it, one of them just got a job working at the prison. :biggrin:

[Observer]

I tried to pay my partner to write my ex-wife a ticket but he insisted on doing it for nothing..................:cool:

haha!

Classic.

[madmike]

As a reservist, I patrol where I live. I dont get too friendly with the neighbors. They are quite uneasy when speaking to me with a big fake grin. They know I will not hesitate to grab my cite book sandals and shoulder holster and start handing out applications for warrants in my front yard. XD Takes alot of patience and a craft of educating people on the spot without ruffling feathers.

[23112]

Wow, talk about a trip down menory lane: Your Mentor, Nellie, Retchp...classics from the good 'ol days!

[AyatollahGondola]

I'm certain that if there was a threat to public safety involved, a ticket would be strongly considered under any circumstances.

I have an associate who had a parent who was drinking and driving. He did his best to discourage the driving part of this since the drinking was not going to stop. He went as far as disabling the auto involved. Then one day he was notified by a neighbor that the auto was being enabled, and he drove over to find the relative under the influence and preparing to drive. When all practial efforts failed to dissuade the relative from driving away, he called the local sheriff. The relative was arrested, and later convicted, losing his license, and requiring numerous other remedies prescribed by law.
My associate was promptly written out of the will, but in the interim, drove his relative to every court appearance or associated event for the next year.

[CivvieInNY]

My mother, by the way, is very disappointed in me for citing my Uncle Harold. But in my defense, he was going the wrong way on the freeway while reading a book, shaving, talking on a cell phone, and changing his child's diaper. ;)

dw, c'mon, man. No courtesy? Jeez. He merely approached the wrong exit and, since the exit was not clearly marked as proscribed by law, he inadvertently went the wrong way. No harm no foul. You must be a hit at the family gatherings. I mean, at least Ole Uncle Harold wasn't drunk. :wink:


Seriously, courtesy is a tool in your arsenal as good as any other tool. The only thing a police officer is REQUIRED to take action on is a felony in progress. Other than that, what we're really talking about is a VIOLATION of the law. Using your tool to warn & admonish as opposed to summonsing can go an extremely long way. Not everyone you stop deserves paper. There are mitigating factors in ALL circumstances. Yes, even if someone is driving "under the weather." Things can 'go away.'

retchp, you poor soul. But ain't you never hear-d the advice from the Godfadder, "Never go against the family." :lol:

[highwaybs]

NO Way.....that would require talking to her

[Propbraker]

My grandmother once asked my father(LEO) if he would ever write her a ticket, dad's response was he would call for back-up.:biggrin:

:lol:

[HonkingAntelope]

There are mitigating factors in ALL circumstances.

That is 100% true, but why isn't the law written to recognize that? Instead, the better majority of VC statutes are written solely for the purpose of making the conviction easier rather than to punish only the people who create an actual safety risk.

IMO, merciless and indiscriminate enforcement is the one and the only approach that consistently gets bad laws off the books, and I don't see why anyone would be against that.

[Fire1]

IMO, merciless and indiscriminate enforcement is the one and the only approach that consistently gets bad laws off the books, and I don't see why anyone would be against that.

That is why you are not a peace officer.:doh::closed:

[zanev]

Is the 'spirit of the law' the reason people don't get tickets for going 1-3mph over the limit?

[23112]

I would totally cite your mother! :lol:

[FTY]

I would totally cite your mother! :lol:

I would cite yours but she would probably get mad and kick me out of bed.....:biggrin:

[23112]

I would cite yours but she would probably get mad and kick me out of bed.....:biggrin:

That's not funny--she died years ago in a van fire. :evil:






HAHA! Just kidding, Roberta! Douche bag!